Gees! What a ride!

Being witness to someone being hit, abused or hurt can cause the same or IMO more trauma, than being the one receiving the abuse.

Family and a close friend have expressed their sadness years and years later about seeing me hurt verbally and physically.

Told me stories that I didn’t remember and were extremely emotional relaying their experiences and feelings about it to me.

Even apologizing for being unable to help. How agonizing would that have been for very young tiny humans, watching someone they cared for, being hit and verbally assaulted over and over again and the feeling of helplessness, fear and sadness.

I felt so much heartache for them and wanted to comfort them, that in some way, I felt responsible for their pain too?

CRAZY! I hurt so much for my friends and family, my heart ached seeing their pain, more than any pain I experienced at the time.

Many people are hurt, by childhood trauma…. not just the one suffering the abuse. I have also realised it doesn’t end when the abuse stops, it lingers long after and is the foundation of how your body and mind reacts.

In saying that…. For all that they suffered and all I suffered, I broke that cycle of abuse. I have never physically or mentally abused my child or any other child, for this, am super careful with my emotions and words.

I extremely proud and it will forever be my greatest achievement.

My daughter is outspoken, strong willed, tells me everything, expresses herself (although she is a teen, sometimes not in the best way lol), she is kind, caring and very strong.